Last night, Bartolo Colon became the first quadragenarian to pitch in extra innings of a World Series game since Dolf Luque in 1933.
Provided below is a photograph of then president Franklin D. Roosevelt arriving at said World Series.
Do you smell that, reader? It is the scent of pure, unadulterated Americana: apple pie, trenchcoats and Trilby hats, tobacco juice. It is also the stench that accompanies a decade of crippling economic depression and imminent war. Capital-A Americana, this photo. I can’t imagine an image more deserving of a closer look, courtesy of Banknotes Industries’ own state-of-the-art-in-1977 Yushityu® Forensic-Image-Enhancement-Machine-For-Forensics.
Let’s zoom right in, shall we? Enhance!
I think we’re onto something, reader. I feel it in my loins and in my mouth, which suddenly tastes like every Applebee’s appetizer all at once. Enhance!
Hmm, what’s that bit of color there? It looks like a jelly donut that is also a sexual tour de force.
Enhance me, baby, one more time.
Ah, there it is. A jelly donut? Perhaps. A sexual tour de force? Undeniably.
This has been Great Moments in Photographic Enhancement: 1933 World Series Edition.